I tried to get abs at SXSW but couldn’t handle the burn

The emerging cosmetic procedure is as optimistic as I imagined. It's 80 degrees and it's humid in Austin, Texas today. It really feels like a swamp, but all the women in the RealSelf house do not care about the heat. They want their free beauty treatments, and I came specifically to get sit-ups.

RealSelf is a website and an application that has been available for a decade. It provides people with more detailed information about cosmetic procedures through reviews and photos generated by users, and earns money through the advertisements of doctors on the site. For SXSW, the company qualified a home to offer people free consultations and treatments.


i tried to get abs at sxsw but couldnt handle the burn

Photo by Ashley Carman / The Verge

Visitors can be multimillionaire, have a breast augmentation consultation, or can be injected Dysport or Restylane in the face to remove wrinkles, fill in their lips or erase the lines of the frown. . The injections are made in a tent that faces an alley, not exactly a spa. Still, at least one influencer took advantage of the free injections, as well as many other normal people. I do not know who she is, even though I took a picture of her, but my public relations contact told me that she is an influential person, and I believe it. A man filmed her when the procedure was done, and made her injected face look elegant and pleasurable. I was influenced, honestly.


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Photo by Ashley Carman / The Verge

However, I am a nervous shipwreck and allergic to almost everything in this world, so instead of injections, I wanted to try Emsculpt, which forces your muscles to contract through the directed electromagnetic energy. It is a low risk and non-invasive treatment. The only warning is that you can not prove it if you have a metal implanted in your body, including a copper IUD.

I ate cheese last night, so I thought I could use Emsculpt not only to remove the fat from my stomach, but also to forget my bad eating and drinking decisions at SXSW. However, my public relations guide tells me that this dream will not come true because I would need four 30-minute sessions for two weeks to see the results. Whatever is. I do not have metal in my body, and I want to try the abs.


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I lay down in a bed and a woman explains the non-metals rule and then asks me not to use my phone because the machine could cause a short circuit or something like that. This was fine with me, since I just had my PR link take a picture of me.

I unbuttoned my pants and she tied the Emsculpt to my abdomen. She lit it, and I felt my abs contract without my control. One session is supposed to be equivalent to 20,000 sit-ups, but my session was probably 10 sit-ups. I could not handle the Emsculpt.

A strong contraction lasted a couple of seconds. He had not planned to take advantage of the full 30-minute session due to time constraints, but he could not lie anyway. I wanted to stop after three minutes. It did not hurt me necessarily, but I did not enjoy the lack of control over when my muscles contracted.

I would rather exercise, be real, because at least then I would know when I'm going to do a crisis instead of having a machine that automates it. The woman who used the machine before me loved her and wished she had $ 3,250 to complete the series, which is the average cost of Emsculpt, according to RealSelf. This woman speculated that celebrities do this all the time and this is how they keep their abs and glutes, which is amazing.

Clearly, as much as I would like this to be true, I am not a celebrity or an influential person, since I could not handle the most basic beauty experience. [19659013]

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